[00:00:00] Hello and welcome back to the podcast. I have to say, I am already really enjoying this frequency and excited by what it is opening up within me, within my life, how it's gonna ripple out into the universe, and I'm really glad you're here.
[00:00:22] I have to tell you, yesterday, Terry and I had such a wonderful day. It was a really restful day actually. We really invited ourselves to relax. Our friend J stopped by, and you may or may not know, but that is actually how Terry and I met, was through our mutual friend J Harrison Ghee, who was featured on my last podcast and is a dear friend, has been a student of this work and we had just such a lovely dinner, as Terry was also doing a final fitting for an upcoming fashion show. And then we were on our way out to go to Brooklyn. And our friend DJ Spinna, S-P-I-N-N-A, you guys have to look him up. His work is so good. But DJ Spinna actually played the after party to our wedding. So Terry surprised me the week of our wedding and said, Hey. I got DJ Spinna to come play at our apartment for a few hours and it was such a treat.
[00:01:34] So it was so cool. I've been saying cool a lot, but it was so cool to just be able to go out and dance and have the best time celebrating Spinna's birthday, but also getting to celebrate the love and the celebration that is just inherently in my life. And yeah, it was a little bit of a walk down memory lane. Because J gave the Welcome Toast at our wedding and retold the story of how Terry and I met at their party and to think and to witness how much has transpired in the last three years is, is wild. And then to go and celebrate the DJ who played at our wedding, like I said, it was just such a lovely pocket of joy.
[00:02:32] And I'm saying that out loud because I think also because of the cold weather in New York City, Terry and I have been, you know, staying inside more and we haven't been getting out and living life as much. And we really had a conversation about it and were talking about prioritizing fun and joy, and as you can imagine, just dancing our hearts out to like such loving, uplifting music all night long was just so necessary. So maybe that's your reminder to find some pockets of joy and fun and also physicality to feel the energy, because that is what we're gonna talk about on today's episode, is really the importance of embodiment and how you're feeling on a day-to-day basis.
[00:03:23] Because it's so easy to start going to next week, the week after that, thinking about next month. I mean, I find myself doing this too, where you're starting to think about the year ahead and planning things and it's a beautiful and necessary thing to live a conscious, creative life. And, we have to find the balance, or rather we can find the balance of really zooming in to this moment, right here, right now. Like you right now, listening to this podcast has access to changing how you feel for the rest of your day. Changing how you feel for the rest of this next 20 minutes. Changing how you feel for the rest of the hour. Which is always influencing and impacting who you believe you are, what kind of energy you're sending out into the universe, as if you are this radio, right?
[00:04:33] And most people who are listening to me are familiar with some of these concepts and tools and law of attraction and all of that, and it really is about harnessing The Power of Now, which is the title of a very famous Eckhart Tolle book. But really knowing that now is where you can change things. So if we're not slowing down to be curious about the embodiment, the actual felt energy in our body. That's where we sometimes miss out on the potency of creation. And I'll say this out loud, is it's not a problem because we're always learning and relearning and learning and deepening our understanding of these concepts, but I do think it's the most missed opportunity. When we're thinking so far ahead or sort of tapping into our future self, but forgetting to come back to the power of this moment right here.
[00:05:43] Which I also think is why it's so valuable to have a place to anchor into, whether it's this podcast, whether it's joining us inside of Anything and everything, to have a weekly coaching hour, where you're consciously tuning yourself on a regular basis. Because if the energy is not shifting, we really are missing out on how much can change within, like I said, this hour, this day, that ever so slightly changes the end point of where we're heading.
[00:06:19] And so what I wanna talk about today is desire. Desire. And it is so interesting because I feel like this has been, especially for like the last six months, maybe even the last year, desire has really been on the forefront of my work and allowing ourselves to come back to desire based decisions. Like desire as the energy, access to feeling good, to prioritizing what we would love. And for some reason, I don't know if this is just because of how I was brought up my Catholic background, it just always felt like desire was sort of, I don't know, this intangible thing that was not necessarily considered air quote "good." Like desire was sort of, associated, at least for me and my experience was associated with like temptation or like coveting or this idea of like wanting what you don't have that was always, yeah, just a little bit discouraged. And so I've really been loving this expansion of desire and this prioritization of pleasure as a tool, as an entry point to fueling ourselves towards what we want to create.
[00:08:05] And I mentioned briefly on the last episode that I think a lot of 2025 for me personally, was this undercurrent of goal aversion, and maybe I'll do a whole episode on that. But what I really mean by goal aversion is this idea of like resistance to engaging with goals, resistance to wanting to set something that I wanted to achieve, because I was tired and I felt like I had been pushing and, you know, like overworking and hustling and like, because I had become so resistant to that frequency, the idea of goal setting just kind of fell to the back burner. And I don't think it's good, bad, right or wrong. I mentioned, you know, a lot has changed. I got married, I had an incredible year. It was the year that I was meant to have, and still there was a heaviness around the idea of goals.
[00:09:07] And what has been so interesting, especially as I'm, you know, doing this work with clients, I found that many of my clients have the same relationship to goals. Especially if you're high achieving, especially if you're someone who is accomplished in life, right? Like that idea of setting goals is something that we're familiar with. It's like you set that goal and then you work really hard towards it. Or you set that goal and it becomes like laser focused and like, what do I need to do? I'll do it. And I don't know. I think it's like laced with this energy of discipline, which again is not inherently good, bad, right or wrong, but it has this sense of responsibility in this really, again, heavy thing. And we all know how to do that, which is why then we resist it sometimes. But I think that the energy of tiredness around the goal is not necessary. It's not essential to achieving a goal. It's just the most practiced way that we've all done it. It's the most familiar way that we've related to goals.
[00:10:24] And so this is where with my clients, we started replacing the word goal with desire. Now, I know that might sound just a little bit like it's semantics, but I want you to notice what happens in your body when you think about something you desire versus like a three year goal. And I wanna be really clear right now, I'm not saying it has to be one or the other. I'm just saying that there's an opportunity to clean up or recalibrate the frequency. Okay. But notice goal versus desire, like what changes in your body? For me, I know when I say desire, it's like my shoulders drop. I feel excited. Like there's that tingly sense of, I don't know, excitement, eagerness, like, Ooh. It just feels like delicious. And I do think goals can have that energy and this is where I wanna sort of reestablish or rewire the connection to goals, so that the energy of goals has this frequency of desire.
[00:11:45] Because I do think that this is the antidote to goal aversion. Because no one wants to not accomplish a goal that they set for themselves. I think we set the goal because we really want that thing, or we desire that thing. What we don't want is the shame, heaviness, disappointment, frustration that comes along with not accomplishing the goal and what we make that mean. Right, but if it's fueled by desire and we're not sort of like fueling it with rigidity or structure, again, those things are not good, bad, right or wrong. But if the way we've been doing it doesn't feel good, we have to reassess the entry point, right?
[00:12:33] We have to reassess how do we make this net positive? How do we make this, you know, maximized for our enjoyment, knowing that we're still opting into the challenges, right? Because what desire also is not, is avoiding the difficult, challenging moments. Like those things are not mutually exclusive, right? We can be in the desire and still bump up against moments of discomfort without completely abandoning the goal. I think that piece is the commitment, right? But even still, commitment doesn't have to feel heavy or like this I don't know, ball and chain to what we're doing. Like the commitment can be light, it could be the wind beneath our wings, right? So this is what I want you to be exploring for yourself. I know that it's changed so much for my clients and even for myself when I'm allowing desire to lead the way.
[00:13:34] Okay? Now I also wanna mention this because I'm sure, at some point, I'm gonna be doing podcast episodes and talking about concepts and introducing you to all of it. And we will talk about Wanted versus Unwanted, and putting our attention more pointedly on the things we desire versus the things that we don't desire. And so you might hear me use these words, wanted desire, you know, interchangeably. But for this specific episode, I do wanna talk about the frequency of wanting something versus desiring, because I think that there is a subtle difference, and so I just wanted to mention that because I don't want you to confuse it with the concept of Wanted versus Unwanted, which is just again, what I just mentioned about not giving our energy to all the shit we don't like or all the shit we don't wanna experience in our life, like our brains will do that automatically. And so that concept is about turning our focus to the things we desire. And I think a lot of times this frequency of wanting versus having right is so different. In the same way that wanting versus desiring is really different.
[00:14:57] I think that when we want something and why this comes up a lot, especially in the conversation of law of attraction is that when you want something and you don't have it, the wanting amplifies the not having. The wanting, can signal to our brains the absence, the lack, the need for something. And we all know what that feels like in our bodies when we're like, Ugh, ugh. Like, I really want more money, or I just want someone to like figure this out. Like we know what that wanting feels like. It's the need. It's like not sexy. It feels like frustration. It feels like, again, the absence of having what you desire.
[00:15:43] The reason why I love the frequency of desire and what it personally gives me access to is the presence of the thing that I want, the having of it. And I think the frequency of desire not only feels good in my body, like it feels like euphoric. It feels like enjoyment. It feels like pleasure. And we can use that energy regardless of whether we have something or not. Like I'm even thinking about like, I could desire this cup of coffee that's in my hand and be like, Ooh. So appreciative of it without feeling like, oh my God, I need a coffee. And I could desire a coffee, even if it's not in my hand and it still feels like the connection to the experience I wanna have.
[00:16:36] So this is what I want you to just start being aware of and maybe start swapping this out for yourself too, is like, what are my current desires? What's my desire list? And how can I start embodying and practicing the frequency of enjoying that experience that I'm calling to me, whether it's air quote here right now or not, how can I enjoy that experience as much as possible? Because again, the goal itself is neutral. That thing that we desire is neutral. This is really about changing the relationship to the thing that you want, so that while you are thinking about that thing that you desire or want, the energy in your body is aligned so that the energy of your body is rehearsing having that experience. Not needing, not missing, not wanting because it's not here yet energy. The frequency is what's different and when desire is the frequency of your goals, it's creating alignment. It's allowing enjoyment, which again, I think makes us more likely to remain committed even through the obstacles.
[00:17:59] So we're gonna be talking a lot more about this and notice what would be different when your goals are not this heavy thing, but instead are fueled by this natural desire to fulfill it, the enjoyment, the positive expectation of having it,
[00:18:19] I think in those moments, it's like, oh, I'm not worried. 'cause I, I'm connected to the desire. I know it's coming. So anytime that I'm experiencing a challenge or an obstacle or something, I have to work through a decision point. I'm much more willing to do that knowing that it's facilitating moving me forward towards having the thing that I want.
[00:18:43] All right. Try that on this week. The energy of desire as your fuel, as your wings towards what you're working on, knowing that we can be so down to do the work. And we do have a choice in how it feels along the way. All right, that's what I got for you today. I'll see you soon.
