[00:00:00] Welcome. This is Anything and Everything with Kelli Youngman Singh. We are here to live the most expansive experience of your life, guided by intuition and desire and rooted in self trust, authenticity, and love. That's what expands your capacity to receive, allow and fully enjoy what you really want. Nothing is off limits. Nothing needs to be justified. Here for an extraordinary life and to have it all on your terms. Let's begin.
[00:00:44] All right. This next episode is the final drop of these bonus releases for now, and this episode really explores the specific struggles of being a working actor. Now, even if you are not an actor, I think there are so many relatable nuggets within this episode, and I think it opens up the space to be curious about what happens when our mind is experiencing our failures more than the growth, more than the possibilities, more than the success of what actually might be happening in our life right now. So please enjoy this episode with Lauren Maria Medina.
[00:01:34] Hello, everybody. Welcome back to the Love Your Life as a Performer podcast. I'm so excited to be here with Lauren Maria Medina, and we're just gonna have a conversation and talk about her journey with coaching. Yeah. So Lauren, say hello, introduce yourself. All the things. Hi. Hi, Kelli. Hi, everyone. Thank you so much for having me.
[00:01:59] I'm so excited to, like, reconnect with you and chat. I'm an actor, singer, artist, creative in the musical theater world, screen, TV, film world and beyond. And I started working with Kelli really, like, I feel like more seriously in January. And yeah, the benefits and the new perspective that I get to apply to my life has been amazing, so I'm always happy to chat about it.
[00:02:26] Yeah. So Lauren, you originally joined Momentum in, like, November-ish of 2023. And if you can remember, like, what kind of drew you to coaching, or, like, what inspired you to book a call? Like, what was going on at the time? Yeah. I think, I think I was at, like- Breaking point sounds dramatic, but I, I felt I had exhausted options, like, trying to address the constant and persistent, like, circular thoughts I was having around the industry, around auditioning, around my career.
[00:03:09] And I had done The Artist's Way, which is a really incredible book about, which I've talked to you so much about, about, like, creative rehabilitation. And I wanted to just keep that sort of momentum going. And, you know, I was, I still am, in acting class, and I, I felt like I was doing... I was being really intentional and doing all of the things within my control, or at least I thought, to have a good mindset around my career slash just progress my career, period.
[00:03:40] And I thought maybe a better angle in progressing my career is looking inward and changing my mindset around it, not just alone, but with the help of somebody else. And then I was just seeing your posts and, and then I had that amazing interaction with you when we worked on a project together. Oh, my gosh.
[00:04:01] Wait, will you tell this story? Yeah. Well, we were working on a friend's, like, original song, and, like, his music video for it. I just was, like, chatting with you, and I was talking about The Artist's Way, I think. And you were like, "Yeah, that sounds really cool. That's kind of what I do. Like, I'm a, I'm a coach and slash, like, my journey..."
[00:04:24] I feel like, one, I have to just say this out loud. Lauren has the voice of an angel. Oh. And so when we were working on this project, I heard the track, 'cause we were, like, dancing to it and recording, like, the video. But, like, I heard her voice before I met her. And so we, like, I feel like met at a random bar where we were filming part of the video.
[00:04:44] Yes. And we just started having a conversation, and you shared that with me, and I was telling you about how I manifested my Broadway debut. Yes, that's what it was. That's what it was. And so I told you that story, and you were like, "Whoa." And I feel like that was just, like, our first interaction, and then it was, like, a few months later that you had decided to, like, make the leap and join Momentum.
[00:05:06] Totally. That was totally the catalyst. I had to, like, see out where I was at at that time in order to, like, have the space to be ready to, like, take you on, to be honest. So- Yeah ... when I, when I met you and it all fell into place. But yes, you're right. That is how it went. So okay. So when you joined the paradigm in January 2024, especially because I guess we have another round of the paradigm happening right now, we're getting ready for enrollment for January 2025, what was like, what was your biggest desire, or, like, what did you wanna get out of doing that container in the first place?
[00:05:44] I feel like so much. I just wanted- I wanted to do everything within my power and within my capability to, like, in a practical sense, progress my career And also it felt really urgent and necessary for my, like, wellbeing and peace to, like, unblock all of the blocks I had as a human being living my day-to-day life and in relationship to my career and my, and this industry.
[00:06:15] Mm. Like, like all of it. I think, I think they're ... Now I'm really seeing they're a lot more one and the same than I thought. But yeah, like, I just wanted to improve my quality of day-to-day life, and I found myself, like, almost having, like, a strange, like, obsessive attitude about, like, m- my rejections and, like, the s- the stagnancy I could sometimes feel in, like, the lack of momentum.
[00:06:43] And I was feeling so much momentum. I remember I had just left a really great job playing a really sick role, and during the, like, final month of that run, and, like, the following weeks after, I had final callbacks for, like, five different shows, and all of them really sick projects. And I thought, like, "Surely one of them will land."
[00:07:07] And none of them landed, and I felt really crushed about it, and I felt like I didn't want that feeling to, like, continue to cloud my time reemerging into New York, and I wanted to continue the momentum that I was feeling from that show and those callbacks also. Mm. Yeah. So I hope that answers your question.
[00:07:29] You know what's so wild, Lauren, is actually... 'Cause, okay, we're recording this right now in October, and we- Mm ... wrapped up The Paradigm in July. Yeah. So this is also, like, a little bit of a reunion for us, so it's all kind of coming back- Yes ... to me, too. Yes. Is that also there was, like, a lot of resistance for you in even being in New York during the winter.
[00:07:51] And- Yes ... I think it was really interesting because, again, this is part of why coaching, I think, is so valuable is, like, your perspective on it was like, "Oh my gosh," like, "None of these landed." Yet you were in the room for five incredible projects, like, making it to final callbacks. And on top of that, correct me if I'm wrong, but I think, like, the momentum of your auditions actually was still going.
[00:08:16] Like, you were still getting a lot of auditions- Yes ... at that time, right? I was, but I think I was just so, I was so confused and frustrated, and I felt like a hamster, like, running on a wheel, like, that just wasn't gaining the results I wanted to, that I think part of me was like, "Fuck it." Like, maybe I should just...
[00:08:38] I mean, I honestly, I, like, sometimes still feel pulled that way, just, like, being in your 20s and figuring out what you want. Like, I think a, a part of me was like, "Fuck it. Maybe I need to explore other things in my life I care about." But I think that was more so coming, which you helped me figure out, it was more so coming from a point of view of, like, abandonment and just running away from problems than it was making, like, a joyful decision towards, like, exploring and being curious.
[00:09:07] Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Because I feel like- It's like- ... that was a huge part of your journey, was like, right, we were working on releasing the disappointment or the feelings that were coming up about these, air quote, rejections. Right. But then on top of that, you were starting to explore, well, what else?
[00:09:23] What else? What comes after... Like, what's after the manifestation after the manifestation, right? Yeah. Like, taking that idea of your Broadway debut, which is so freaking inevitable, like, it's just a matter of time, but also realizing, like, that there's so many other things that you're passionate about, right?
[00:09:41] Like, taking that one thing off the pedestal to know that your whole life is enriching who you're becoming as an artist. Yeah. I feel like that was a lot of your journey. Yeah. I'm curious to know, Lauren, 'cause I feel like there was also, like, this idea of travel was really big for you, and, like, when you were thinking about, like, "Maybe I'm just gonna go, and I'm just gonna go away for a few months", let's talk about what it was like for you changing your relationship to knowing that you're not gonna miss out if and when you go on these trips or vacations.
[00:10:16] Like, I feel like there was a little bit of permission granted or permission needed to give yourself to know that it was safe to go out of town, which I think is something that comes up for a lot of performers. Absolutely. Well, a really direct example that happened when I went to Costa Rica... When did I go to Costa Rica?
[00:10:38] In June, I think. Yeah. W- I think that's right. Yeah. I went away for a week, and I had, at least in my memory since I've graduated three years ago, never had a conversation ever, or never made the firm decision at any point in the past three years, "Hey, this week I'm not taking auditions. Like, I need to honor that and relax and have a true vacation," right?
[00:11:02] And I decided for this one, being in Costa Rica and, like, taking the leap to actually do something like that, and, like, all the work that went into it, I was like, "Yeah, I- for one week I'm not gonna take an audition." And then, of course, I got this, like, really big audition. And it was, like, something that was going to take a lot of time for me to do.
[00:11:27] Like, it wasn't something I could just, like, n- quickly get done in Costa Rica. Like, it would have taken up a day of my week probably. Or it would have been a moment. My point being it would have been a moment, right? It wasn't casual. And I remember being really nervous, but, like, doubling down and being like, "Hi, I'm sorry.
[00:11:43] Like, I'm not gonna do this. I really wanna honor this time." And it's funny, 'cause then my agent was like, "Okay, then we're gonna have to pass. Like, they can't wait for you." And I was like, "Okay. I trust this isn't the one." And then I came back from vacation, and then I got an email like a week later from my agent being like, "Oh, actually they can see you- And they can actually take your tape and they're still looking.
[00:12:08] So I was still able to submit the tape, which is so funny. Wait. It just felt like at that time, like, I know it seems like a silly story, but at that time it just felt like- No, it's so good. It's not silly at all, Lauren. Not silly at all Good I have, like, full body chills. Like, it wasn't going anywhere, and also, like, I really, really firmly believe that, like, in order to be a fuller...
[00:12:32] I don't believe, I know, like, in order to be a fuller artist and storyteller, like, you have to travel. You have to meet other people. You have to live a full fucking life outside of this, like, weird bubble we can be in in this industry. And, like, it, it does feel like a push and a pull, and it does feel like opposing things sometimes to, like, take a step out of it and take yourself, whatever, air quotes, "out of the game" for a month, two months, a week.
[00:13:03] But I, I really think if you do it intentionally, like, it, it just makes you a fuller, more rounded human being, and it actually will make you better at what you do. Yeah. Does that make- And I think it... Yeah, totally. And I think it's also, like, just deciding what even, air quote, "out of the game" means for you.
[00:13:25] Yeah. Because when I look back on your journey, Lauren, like, you weren't actually ever out of the game. No, I wasn't. You were, you were just out of the game of, like, being in the cycle of thoughts that felt terrible, right? And engaging with your career in a way that felt... Like, you were intentionally getting out of that game, right?
[00:13:47] Yeah. True. True. If you can remember, what beliefs or thoughts or what allowed you to get to the place where you're like, "Yeah, this is my week away. I'm honoring this time"? Like, I feel like you got to an intentional place about that, where a lot of people would be like, "I don't know how the fuck you did that." So if you have any breadcrumbs for the people, like, what was the journey to get to a belief system where you could just stand and say, "What's meant for me is not gonna pass me by"?
[00:14:24] Practice. And I'm not perfect, obviously, and I still, like, grapple with that all the time, but I'm growing and I'm in a stronger place with it, and it's a constant journey. But I, I really think it's practice. I think it's like these are learned skills that don't just come in a day and from the flip of a switch, like especially when these sort of thoughts are not natural to you or maybe weren't the things you were taught.
[00:14:49] Like, it's unlearning and it's affirmations you have to s- say to yourself every day. I'm looking at, like, my Martha Graham quote on my mirror. Like, I'm thinking of all the time I've put into meditating in the morning and moving my body and making space in my body so there's space in my mind. I'm thinking of, like, the intentionality I had in taking what felt like, which is funny, but at the time felt like a financial risk, like committing to you, like all of it.
[00:15:16] It's just, I think it's been a culmination of, like, a lot of very intentional, not hard work as in like... I- No, yeah, like hard work. Like it can be difficult because there, there can be resistance within you slash like you, you need to be intentional about it over time. So I really think that's what it is.
[00:15:38] Oh, Lauren, that's so good, and I think you just hit on a few things 'cause, I mean, I still make investments and it still feels like, "All right, here we go," right? Like that feeling I think is a huge part of the transformation. But even with the risk or the perceived risk, that feeling of like, "Oh, here we go," like what allowed you to anchor into certainty and make the leap?
[00:16:06] The leap to work with you? Even, yeah, yeah. Like, 'cause you said it felt like a risk at the time. Yeah. I think, I ought, to, to be so honest, I think it was two things. I was like, I've exhausted so many... Like, I've tried on so many different things, and like, I'm tired. And like, I don't wanna say, desperation isn't the, the right word. Like, on one end, I was just like, I wish I could tell you part of it was an empowering choice, but part of it wasn't.
[00:16:34] Like, part of it was just like, I'm so sick of feeling this way. Like- Yeah ... done. Like, I'm done. I'm tired of my bullshit, right? Tired of my bullshit. So there had to be a certain amount of bullshit felt for me to get there, do you know what I'm saying? Definitely. And, but two also, the truer voice within me, knowing that there's no better an investment than an investment you make in yourself. Mm. And like, if you can swing acting classes, and you can swing voice lessons, and you can swing the, the outfits you buy for your auditions, I don't know, you fill in the examples. Like, if you can start to unlock feeling that way about, like, investing in your voice, investing in your body and dance classes, investing in your craft and acting classes, whatever, right? I could go on and on. You can also apply that mindset, and should apply that mindset, to investing in your mental wellbeing and your very important health around your perspective of y- your career, your relationship to it, your relationship to your creativity, maybe number one. Because that's, that's what's guarding all of it.
[00:17:49] Mm-hmm. But I don't know if I, I don't know if I ever really, really clearly pieced that together- Yeah ... until I, like, made the leap to work with you and, like, saw the benefits. Yeah.
[00:18:00] The other thing that I think comes up for a lot of people is, like, in the beginning, six months can feel like a long time to, like, commit to doing something. Yeah. Did that resistance come up for you when you thought about joining The Paradigm? Uh, I could see that probably for a lot of people. I think I'm somebody that when I commit, I'm in. Mm. So I was like, bet. And it made sense to me. Like, if you wanna see long-term change, like you have to commit to that level sometimes, I think.
[00:18:36] I mean, what you do is not like therapy, obviously. Like, it's not the same as therapy, but if, I feel like if you look at it from that sort of mindset, like yeah, there's some unlearning to do. There's some practices to uphold. There's some hand-holding to be had in the beginning, and like, there's kinda no way out but through, like, in time. So like, that, I was never, like skeptical about that. That always made a lot of sense to me. Okay. Cool. And I was ready, so.
[00:19:04] Lauren, so another, you know, part of the paradigm, right, it's all about having it all, personally, professionally, financially. I'm curious, because I feel like you had some really cool shit happen when you started opening yourself up to like, yeah, I also have these other passions. And if I'm re- remembering correctly, I think there were some things you had to move around once you got your show at Ogunquit. Yeah. But there was like, some other really cool opportunities in creating an offer and exploring what you wanted to contribute to the world as you were pursuing your career.
[00:19:41] Maybe. Can you share a little bit about that?
[00:19:44] Oh, yeah. I mean, I just feel, I'm sure a lot of us do, I feel I have so much more to offer to the world besides, like performing in a show or like, within a job. And I also think a huge part of enjoying my life when I'm not in a show, because so much of your life is when you're not on a job, as opposed to the mindset being like, I'm just floating through my life and like, making it by until a job comes, which is just such a- Mm shitty way to live your life. And I think, like a lot of young people, like out of school feel that way, that like the job's gonna save them, which is just not a sustainable way to live and a really toxic relationship with work.
[00:20:27] Instead, we really explored, like- How can I use my time in between jobs, like, really fruitfully slash, to get back to your point, like, use the skills I have outside of, like, performing in a show, or the passions and ways I wanna change and wanna help people, like, in that time. So, like, I started to explore, which I'm still expanding obviously, like, coach- I love kids, and I, like, have so much experience working with kids. And, like, explore, like, working with children more in terms of having my own coaching business with kids, teaching them acting and on-camera skills and musical theater skills.
[00:21:08] Or, like, I work for this amazing company, AIM, which stands for Awareness and Motion, which is, like, all about helping people in the corporate world or children in New York public schools, or teachers in public schools, like, mindfulness skills, community-building skills. Like, really tangible mindfulness practices they can do to help them show up for their jobs better. And, like, that has helped me so much in enjoying my day-to-day life, as opposed to, like, going to a job that I don't feel like is me living in my purpose or, like, helping people. So, like, I, I feel like your work with me helped me to explore not only, like, things I'm really good at and things that I feel connected to my purpose in outside of performing, but also, like, making money off of it, too.
[00:22:01] Mm-hmm. So that, so that I could take steps away from things that I felt like I had to do in order to make money even though I hate it. Yeah. So good. It's so interesting, right? I think when we're in that season or in that chapter, it's really hard to acknowledge that we just have choices that we get to make, and that we can lean into those choices and trust that money will come through those avenues as well.
[00:22:25] Yeah. What, what was it like for you, Lauren? 'Cause I know there was a time when you were sort of pulling back from your serving job at the time, and, like, wanting to give more energy to your coaching and things like that. Yeah. What helped you bridge that gap or that jump for yourself with, like, your financial thoughts and worries?
[00:22:46] I... Yeah, I think, I think just, like, I, I don't know. I think you just really unlocked something in me when you were like, "You have skillsets and talents right now that people would love to pay for. Like, people would love to work with you right now. Like, you don't need to, like, fix yourself." Obviously we're always learning and growing, but you don't need to, like- Do something to yourself or take a million courses or whatever.
[00:23:14] Like right now as you are, you have skills that people would put money behind and people like wanna work with you. And I just think a lot of people like don't think that way because we're in survival mode and it's- Mm ... something that's easy and it's right there. But when you switch from like survival/ like a place of scarcity to like a place of abundance and a place of curiosity and exploration, like I, I feel like it was more just like an internal shift of like excitement about possibilities as opposed to like schlepping it to work and this is just how it's been and this works for me.
[00:23:51] But it wasn't exciting. Mm. You know? That's so good. I love that clarification of like moving out of survival mode into curiosity and abundance, and really like creation mode of like- Yeah ... what can I create from here? Right. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Lauren, this is so amazing. I'm so excited for everyone to hear this.
[00:24:17] Yeah. I feel like is there anything that you would say to your younger self or to someone else who's maybe still in a place where they're not feeling great about their performing career? Oh my gosh. I mean, there's so much to say. That your mind and your thoughts are of the utmost importance, and when you can have, first when you can be more conscious and just like even clock and be aware of the thoughts you're having, and two, when you can start to sharpen and control them, and three, be intentional about those thoughts being helpful for you.
[00:25:04] We've talked a lot about like helpful versus true. Like- Mm ... what's actually gonna like- Keep you headed in the direction you wanna be headed, that's, like, everything and more. This business, this craft, is, like, such a mind game. I think I knew that to an extent when I, you know, first getting into all of this and graduating.
[00:25:27] But now I know more than ever, like, your thoughts really create your reality. So you have to check in on yourself and explore the work you need to do to keep that sharp, 'cause it is- Mm ... kind of everything. I mean, I could go on and on- ... but I think, I think that is, like, sort of, like, the ethos of your work and, like, the work we've done together and, like, the core of the changes I've made in my life.
[00:25:53] Mm. You know? Lauren, so tell me, what are you most excited about now? What's, like, really lighting you up? And, like, is there any vision that you want all of us to hold for you? Oh, that's so sweet. Thank you. What's really lighting me up right now? I mean, we had talked about this in our, like, final month working together, but I just, like, last month, wrapped up an incredible show out of Gumquit that was a Sondheim show, which was, like, my reason for doing it all, with such an incredible theater, phenomenal actors that I learned so much from.
[00:26:32] My point being, it was such a great experience that aligns with the sort of projects and career I wanna have. And I just wanna use that time as a springboard into launching me more strongly and pointedly in the direction I wanna go. Which is, like, being a multifaceted actor, artist, and creative that takes on a myriad of different kind of projects that really awaken, inspire, and change people, and working with friends and all sorts of incredible people and creatives and actors in TV, film, stage, all of it.
[00:27:17] That's what I wanna do. And now I have some more spare time than I usually have, just from, like, stepping away from my serving job and having more time to focus on, like, AIM and my coaching business. So right now specifically, I really wanna spend that time doubling down on acting class. And I really wanna, this is, like, a fresher thought literally of this week, but I really wanna start m- I think, making my own work.
[00:27:48] And, like- Ooh says playwriting and screenwriting classes. Everyone is sh- like almost shoved that down my throat, like for years that I should be doing that. Um, not that I'm doing it 'cause I feel like I should, but because I wanna explore a different creative outlet, and I have a little more time on my hands, so why the hell not?
[00:28:08] So all of that. Oh my gosh, Lauren, that's so fucking cool. And to everyone listening, like your vision is allowed to be that, I don't even know the word, like expansive, en- encompassing. Like it gets to be all of it, and I feel like it's such a testament to the work that you've done, Lauren, that you're like able to speak that so clearly and so openly and so like confidently, knowing exactly what you want.
[00:28:40] Thank- That's really cool ... yeah, I mean, you've really helped me with knowing that like the, the faster and, ugh, I don't wanna say the best. What are the words I'm trying to say? That I guess it, it really is helpful when you are very specific and clear about what you want, and that there's a million different avenues, and there is no right way to get to what you want.
[00:29:05] But what's most important is the super clarity about what you want, how it's gonna feel when you get it in your body, and- Yeah, I can't emphasize enough, like, I sometimes, you know, have, like, a right and wrong mentality, and that, like, there's no right way to get there, and life is full of, like, surprises, and the world and the universe will, like, subvert your expectations and, like, delight and surprise you and change it up on you all the time.
[00:29:31] So you don't know how you're gonna get there. But, like, as long as you know where you're going, as long as you know where you're going, I guess is my point. Yeah. So you've helped me be very clear about where I'm going. So good. Lauren, if anyone listening wants to connect with you or has kiddos they wanna recommend to your coaching- Yeah
[00:29:51] how can people find you? Uh, my website, laurenmariamedina.com. It's my full name, has all my contact info there and more about me. Hit me up. Let's kiki. Amazing. All right. Thank you so much for joining us, Lauren. It's such a treat, and just, like, forever cheering you on. Kelli, love and adore you. You're such a...
[00:30:17] I'm endlessly grateful for you, for real. Thank you. You're so welcome. All right, everyone. That is our interview. I hope you were as inspired as I was hearing from Lauren, and I look forward to supporting you on your journey as well. I'll meet you back here for another episode. Bye.
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