[00:00:00] Welcome. This is Anything & Everything with Kelli Youngman Singh. We are here to live the most expansive experience of your life, guided by intuition and desire and rooted in self trust, authenticity, and love. That's what expands your capacity to receive, allow and fully enjoy what you really want. Nothing is off limits. Nothing needs to be justified. Here for an extraordinary life and to have it all on your terms. Let's begin.
[00:00:44] Hello, and welcome back to the podcast. It's been a minute, and I have to tell you, I am not the same woman I was the last time I hopped on here to record. So much has been happening, and through all of the transformation, I'm most excited to continue sharing what I have learned on my journey and what's unfolding within me in real time.
[00:01:13] So what I wanted to talk about today is Creating New Results. Because if you tuned in to the last opening of Anything & Everything, that was a huge part of what I was marketing or talking about in correlation to this new round that we are now two weeks in. It's been going so well. And so much of what I wanted to bring into this room, into this container that has honestly restructured and been so streamlined and simple and sexy.
[00:02:00] I got a really big download, actually the day before the group was beginning. And I totally gave myself permission to restructure the Members Portal to really pare back the information that was in there so that the emphasis was on Creating New Results rather than, you know, getting lost in the portal or the trainings, or being a good student, being a perfect student, which of course there's always learning happening. And, not for the sake of just consuming the information, but actually getting into the practice of Creating New Results.
[00:02:46] So 100%, I feel like 1,000%, so much of what has shifted within me has already permeated into my spaces and the way that I'm coaching clients, and it's just been so fun. So if you have been in my world, if you have been thinking of working together, you can definitely book a launch call now. I have private spots available, and you can also get on the wait list for the next round of Anything & Everything.
[00:03:21] But to the point of Creating New Results, I felt like it was really important to bring this back to the forefront, because I think that it can be or has been a trend to focus on the feeling good. Now, I definitely still subscribe to choosing to feel good as a personal baseline, and I also know that in order to feel good as a baseline, you have to be willing to engage with all emotions. And I'm pretty sure that I've talked about that on the podcast before, and if not, there's going to be a whole episode coming out, because it's really, really essential to know that we have to be willing to engage with all emotions in order to have the Emotional Agility and the emotional skill set to move forward. Like, we actually have to know what it means to process emotions fully, to witness them, to allow them, and to be really skilled at doing so, in order to start Creating New Results.
[00:04:40] And one of the reasons why clients come to work with me is, of course, to feel better in the process. And while that is such a worthy result to wanna create more Emotional Agility, more comfort with your emotions, I think that is just part of the underlying structure of having the ability to Create New Results, right? So we do that, we understand and learn the emotional skill sets so that we can create new results.
[00:05:14] Because no matter where you are in your life, even if you love your life, even if you absolutely freaking love your life, there are still going to be new challenges that arise, because the obstacles are the portal. So that obstacle, that circumstance, that situation that's currently making you a little crunchy, we love them because in the process of expanding past that, right? In the process of going through those challenges, you're gonna become someone entirely different. You're gonna be different on the other side. You're gonna have different capacity. You're gonna have new skill sets, new levels of skill sets, and we wanna be so available for that.
[00:06:06] So a huge part of why I've been bringing results back into the forefront is because I think it's easy to focus on the feeling good and to unconsciously become a little bit adverse to the challenge, to become a little bit entitled to feeling good in a way that prevents our own growth.
[00:06:32] And I found that a lot of clients were bumping up against the choice or sort of this black or white, all or nothing thinking of feeling really good or pushing to move forward. And it felt like this push and pull, tug of war between ease and alignment and, you know, hustle or overworking.
[00:07:00] Now, what I have discovered is that it's not all or nothing. It's not one or the other. It's not this or that. I think it's actually both. Because I do think that no matter what, your thinking, your mindset, your thought-feeling combos, those things are going to contribute to more ease in the long run, and even more ease in the present in how you're relating to whatever you're navigating.
[00:07:34] And if you think that challenge or hard or struggle shouldn't be there, again, you might just opt out or unintentionally take your foot off the gas in a moment that if you were to move forward, if you were willing to really find out what it takes to create the result, what would happen in the process is that you would unlock new levels of capacity, energy, emotional skill, and commitment within yourself that moves the needle forward.
[00:08:17] Now, I think another important aspect of this conversation is that we're not only trying to solve circumstances, problems, obstacles, our biggest challenges as the same version that we are now. Because I really want you to hear me, that when you are trying to create new results, if you do that without identity upgrade, it will feel a little bit like you're banging your head against the wall.
[00:08:53] This is when you're gonna start feeling like, "Ugh, I don't wanna do this. I shouldn't have to do this. It's gonna be easier when..." You'll just find yourself unconsciously feeling like a victim or someone who's swimming up current. It's gonna feel like you're really in the thick of it. And it's a good thing when that happens. I have a whole new concept I've been developing called Identity Glimmers, and I'll talk a little bit more about it in depth soon, but this idea has already been landing with clients so hard, is that when we get moments where our identity is reflected back to us, right? If we're having thoughts like, "I shouldn't have to do this. It should be easier by now. I don't want to. I shouldn't have to do all the work. Why do I always have to be the big person?" Like, if you're having thoughts like that, I want you to know that it's real-time feedback of who you are currently being, and it's much harder to create new results when you're the version of you that feels burdened, obligated, overworked, underconsidered, undervalued.
[00:10:15] Like, if you are already feeling disadvantaged in some way trying to create a new result, think about how that is gonna impact the result, right? That's like... I don't know. You just burn yourself out so much faster because of that identity. So, so much of Creating New Results does come back to identity upgrade.
[00:10:39] Because if you really think about it, the version of you that you are now is currently facing your personal challenges, whatever it may be, money, relationships, business, whatever it is, career. There's a version of you that's struggling with that, and then there's a version of you that knows exactly how to handle any circumstance, any problem, any challenge when it comes up. Not because you know exactly what to do, not the what, but you know Who you're gonna be in that circumstance. You might not have the answer or the solution immediately, but then you tap into becoming the person who can find the solution, right? It's very different to be the person who doesn't know the answer versus being the person who knows exactly how to find the answer, right? That's an identity upgrade.
[00:11:48] And so when we're Creating New Results, we have to be willing to really be so lovingly neutral with ourselves and really honest and onto ourselves when we start having identity glimmers that reflect back to us, whether it's through our thought, behaviors, feelings, evidence in our life. We have to be willing to see those Identity Glimmers for what they are, as feedback, right?
[00:12:18] And the other thing about this is like, again, when we're Creating New Results, why the emotional processing is so important, is that you are going to have feelings of failure, disappointment, envy. Like it's human nature that those kinds of emotions may come up. And if you have the tools to process them, if you have the tools to be curious with yourself in that emotional experience, what changes is that you're no longer judging yourself as you're trying to process emotion, which inevitably makes you more available for new results. But you will not create new results if you don't have that emotional skill, right?
[00:13:08] So what I've been teaching inside Anything & Everything, and what has become the streamlined focus, is understanding that there is a universal process to Creating New Results. There's a universal way of thinking, feeling, being that makes you available to create new results, no matter what they are. And I'm also really excited about this because as I'm streamlining the process, I'm really looking forward to teaching different classes within the program so that you can see how you apply this to making money, or to finding a husband, or to losing 15 pounds, or booking your dream role.
[00:13:54] No matter what the result is that you're wanting to create, you have to really understand who you are being, how you are relating to the result, and be really clear about what you're doing in the process. But not only what you're doing, who you're doing it as. Because we all know that there can be two people with the same exact strategy, right?
[00:14:22] There can be two people that are doing the same exact thing on the surface, but if they are feeling different, if their self-concept is different, if one is really frustrated, insecure, like discounting their results, feeling overlooked, that person is gonna have a different energetic output than someone who's taking the same actions, feeling confident, feeling certain, feeling supported, feeling really successful and proud, that person's gonna move through the world completely differently. Even if they're taking the same actions, I'm sure you can already suspect who's going to get the results because of their emotional state of being, but also because of who they're being in the world, right?
[00:15:27] If one person is feeling completely dejected and frustrated while they're taking action, they're not gonna be as available to opportunities as the person who is taking that action with belief and pride and certainty and forward momentum, right? Those are two different people.
[00:15:49] So this is where the concepts are very interconnected. And as you're changing one thing, as you're utilizing the Emotional Agility, as you're being clearer and more committed to what you're creating, all of these things start expanding how you move through the world, how you show up to meet challenges, how you spend your energy as you're moving through your day.
[00:16:17] Because most people think that if they spend more energy, they're gonna be burnt out in this negative way, which is again, why I think people sometimes take their foot off the gas. Instead of really understanding that the way something feels is just as important as how much energetic output we're giving, right?
[00:16:39] Because you could take a lot of concentrated action and effort and energy to create a new result, which spoiler alert, it does take so much more energy than what we initially think. But if you are afraid of spending that energy, you're gonna hold back, you're gonna conserve, you're gonna be really cautious about how you're moving instead of giving it your all and letting your capacity, your stamina build as a result of doing more, right?
[00:17:15] This isn't about burning out and having complete disregard for how you feel. I think that's very black or white, all or nothing thinking. It's not burn yourself out or be super committed. My curiosity is like, who do you become when you can expend more energy, but also you're so happy to do that and excited and it lights you up that you want to be doing the work more towards whatever result you're wanting to create, knowing that it's going to have a net positive effect.
[00:17:51] Knowing that if you start building your endurance for the unknown, the uncertainty, the challenges, the obstacles, if you opt into finding new levels of comfort within more conflict or more challenge or more adversity, again, what changes is your capacity to be in those experiences more of the time.
[00:18:22] I was telling a client this today, and they didn't love it in the moment because they were kind of arguing for their limitations. And I was like, Listen, I could totally agree with you and coach you to take a break if that's what you want. Or if you're in a space where you do genuinely wanna be engaging with all the things you're doing and find energy and capacity for more, the coaching you're gonna have to take is very different. It's gonna have to be letting yourself witness and be with what's present, and still committing to moving forward, and deciding it's not your scapegoat for why you don't have the result yet.
[00:19:09] And I'll, I'll share something that I shared in one of my emails, which is, again, why I know that this coaching will take you to new levels, because I've been implementing it in my own personal life, is that I really got called out by my coach about using my business against my performing career and vice versa. And as much as you can say you don't think you're doing that, you will know based on the results and based on how you feel, right?
[00:19:40] So in order to create new results, we can't just stay in a place of, "Well, tried that, did that, that didn't work." We actually have to be down to say, "All right, if I don't have the result yet, it's not a problem, and I've gotta be interested, curious, hungry, available in the need to want to solve this, in the desire to want to figure it out."
[00:20:12] And when we stop using what's the habitual easy scapegoat or excuse for why we don't have what we want, what's required of us in order to make that change, of course, is gonna be infinitely harder. It's very easy to believe our excuses, to believe our circumstances and stay in the same place.
[00:20:40] That's when we can focus on the feeling good, tell ourselves we're in alignment, and unintentionally disconnect from the urgency to solve for the new result, okay?
[00:20:51] And I'll give you one other example of this, because one of my clients was putting a lot of pressure on themselves about their performing career, and they wanna be paid as an actor and have that be their primary income. And I totally get that. But what I helped them see was that they were trying to create two results at the same time, right? They were putting a lot of pressure on their acting career to be the source of their income right now in this minute when it's not currently the source of their income. When we're doing that, we're not getting any closer to the actual result that she wanted, which was to be able to make 6K a month, which is about double what she's making now.
[00:21:37] I want you to consider if you weren't holding out for one thing to be the source of this other thing, but instead you just got to work of how could I create that now? One, how could I trust? Who would I be if I actually trusted that I'm getting auditions, things that I'm gonna book now, if I was in belief of that, while also not being dependent or needing one thing to happen in order for the next to happen?
[00:22:09] That's what we get in holding patterns, you guys, and I want you to consider where in your life have you been thinking, "This needs to happen so this can happen," instead of really just getting clear with yourself about what is the result I wanna create, right?
[00:22:25] Where I have been honing this in for my clients is inviting them to be really clear with what the actual result is that you're trying to create. Because if you don't have a very defined result that you're wanting, it's gonna be very confusing to try to move towards that. You might get really distracted thinking about all the other things that need to happen that feel like variables to the outcome, instead of being locked in and focused on the one thing you're wanting to currently create.
[00:23:03] So don't stay vague with this. Really be specific about what you're creating right now, and that's gonna help you move forward much more effectively, right?
[00:23:16] If we have a simple problem that we make very simple to understand, we will have more access to a simple and clear solution. But we just can't get there from there if we're thinking like, "Oh my God, there's so many moving pieces. I've gotta solve for this before this, but I don't really know if that's gonna happen, so I can't make my decision." It's like when we start going down that train of thought, we really overcomplicate how we're navigating and looking for the solution, which is, again, part of the identity upgrade and also informing who you're being as you're Creating New Results.
[00:24:02] Because if you wanna create new results, you do have to be different. And that's not a bad thing. One of my clients heard this as if it was like, well, if you expand your capacity, if you double down on new results, you're creating more hard or you're making it harder for yourself, and that's not the life they want.
[00:24:23] Again, I think it's just a missed opportunity because the version of you who lives this reality they don't have that relationship to the struggle. They're not thinking, "Ugh, it shouldn't be me. I shouldn't have to do this." Instead, the people who meet the moment are asking themselves, "How do I become the person who navigates this situation with so much ease? What are different about my beliefs when I am accustomed to problem-solving in a way that doesn't make it personal, doesn't make it a, a moral failure, that doesn't make it something about me that could be good, bad, right, or wrong?"
[00:25:08] Instead, we're just looking at, if I was willing to create this new result, what would I actually be willing to do in order to facilitate that? And if you can get your brain to a space where you know, "I'm gonna let this take as long as it takes, but my commitment to it is never gonna wobble," even that would be a huge identity upgrade to how you are currently relating to new results, right? It's gonna feel much harder if you think, "Oh, I've been working on this for years, and I'm never gonna figure this out, and I just don't know what to do. I shouldn't have to do this." All of those thoughts pull you out of the power of creating the new result.
[00:25:57] So if this is something you are like, "Yes, I love that I'm at a place now where I feel better, I feel good most of the time, and I'm ready to get back in the current and to challenge myself to think bigger. Not just incrementally bigger, but exponentially. If that's something you're currently desiring, please reach out. Let's talk. I'd love to uncover the possibilities that are available to you that you may or may not know about yet.
[00:26:30] So Creating New Results, that's what we're doing. It's the underlying process to Creating New Results that gives us the environment, the circumstance of really big infinite growth. Because all that's required to change is upgrading your identity while you're remaining really committed to finding a simple solution. This is gonna dial up your resourcefulness and raise the baseline of your energetic output when you really understand this, that Creating New Results is within your power, and if you haven't been tapped into it, most likely you've been focused on the feeling good instead of opting in to the challenge and growth that's gonna facilitate new results.
[00:27:25] All right. That's what I got for you this week. I'll meet you back here next week.
[00:27:30]
